Tag Archives: suffering

Testimony of the Saints, Thoughts of Seraphim Sophia

Ongoing War with the Dragon: A Cry for Help but Silence in Heaven!

Leave a comment

Shalom, Brothers and Sisters in Christ. There are moments when we cry out to God in prayer and are met with what feels like silence from heaven. Spiritual warfare feels incredibly intense in these times, and deep within my spirit I sense that a great battle is unfolding in the heavenly realms. I truly believe the children of God are under heavy attack, facing trials, pressures, and spiritual burdens unlike ever before. Yet even in the silence, we must continue to hold onto faith, trusting that God is still present, still listening, and still moving beyond what our eyes can presently see.

There have been moments when I have felt as though God had abandoned me. In prayer, I lift my voice toward heaven asking if He still hears my cries, because at times I feel completely alone and deeply in need of His guidance. I do not feel that I have much spiritual support within this world, and many people seem consumed by the pressures, distractions, and systems of daily life, leaving little room within their hearts to truly seek the Kingdom of God. Life has become heavy for so many, and I believe there are countless souls who have drifted far away from their connection with the Heavenly Father.

How many people are truly seeking God with sincerity? How many souls genuinely desire to be saved, delivered, refined, and purified during these difficult times of tribulation? So many hearts seem cold and wounded now. People speak carelessly, often without realizing how deeply their words can wound the spirits of others. Compassion, understanding, and genuine love feel increasingly rare in this world.

There are times when it feels as though darkness is spreading throughout humanity, yet at the same time, I believe God is revealing who the true children of the light are. Each soul is choosing which kingdom it will serve. Perhaps we are living through a great separation, a preparation for the Great Harvest. Perhaps God is allowing these trials to reveal who will remain steadfast in faith, who will continue seeking truth, and who will endure with love, humility, and devotion to him until the very end.

At times, when I sit alone journaling and expressing the deepest truths within my heart, I find myself wondering what I could have possibly done to deserve the suffering I have experienced. For years, I have lived quietly and withdrawn from the world, rarely leaving my home. I devote my time to my business, to reflection, and to seeking the Lord daily with all my heart. Yet despite my prayers and devotion, I have felt deep pain within my marriage, as though a great distance has formed between my husband and God. Even though he’s here, he feels far away from me, and there’s just no connection. It feels as though he has slowly given up on life itself, as if somewhere along the journey he lost sight of who he truly is.

At times, it seems he lives within a reality of his own, unreachable in ways that deeply grieve my spirit, and no matter how much love, patience, or support I try to offer, I cannot help someone who does not desire help for themselves. As I drew closer to God and sought him more deeply, it felt as though he moved further away, causing us to become spiritually divided rather than united together in alignment with God at the center of our lives. I chose to surrender myself more fully to God, while it seems he chose to hold onto himself, resisting the surrender, healing, and transformation that can only come through God’s presence.

There are moments when I feel as though every meaningful relationship I have tried to nurture has come under attack. Hurtful words, negativity, and the wishes of others who did not want to see happiness or peace have weighed heavily upon my marriage. Sometimes it feels as though Satan and all spirits of darkness seeks to divide, discourage, and destroy what was once built in love. I know many people across this world experience spiritual struggles, hardships, and battles within their relationships and families. Countless lives have been harmed and affected by dark, malevolent forces.

I believe we must guard our spirits carefully and remain rooted in faith, because when people drift far from God, they can become susceptible to attacks from Satan, harmful influences, bitterness, confusion, and a sense of spiritual emptiness. Marriage, love, peace, and unity all thrive on daily nurturing, prayer, wisdom, and intentional choices. Even though pain and hardship can challenge the soul, I believe healing, renewal, and freedom are always possible through God’s presence, truth, and enduring love.

From what I can tell, every soul is being tested, so making wise choices in life is crucial. You can’t serve both God’s kingdom and Satan’s kingdom at the same time you have to choose. You’re either a faithful servant of God or a servant of Satan. This will be a tough time for many, as families, friendships, and marriages may fall apart because of this division. In my marriage, I or God was never chosen. Me and God were never a priority in this marriage. The only thing that matters in this world is his job, it’s an attachment. My husband’s faith has been tested so many times, and he can’t even see it. He’s lost his path and is trapped in his own spiritual darkness. Only God can save him, and I pray for him as well as for everyone else battling the light and darkness within themselves.

We both started this ministry as mighty warriors of God’s kingdom, but unfortunately, he has fallen. He doesn’t even know who he is anymore in God. He doesn’t even mention God at all. I am the only one who talks about God in this marriage. I have been telling him for so many years that he was under attack, but he didn’t’ listen to me at all. Everything that I said was rejected. He turned against me as if I was the enemy. For years, I tried to help free him from his inner darkness. But he shut himself off, building a strong barrier around his heart that nothing and no one could break through, closing himself off to the light of God. I’m sharing this truth because so many people are going through it, and it’s real.

This has been happening to many people. Many souls have been drifting away from God’s kingdom and losing hope. I know I’m not alone, but I’m just bold enough to share what’s been going on in my life. I’ve always faced my battles alone, with no one to shield me, counting only on the holy ones in heaven to stand against the dark and evil forces that have tried to bring me down. People have taken their sides, and many will choose the beast system and their shadow selves over their own family, spouse, and God. Darkness is spreading in the world, and many have been misled by Satan, leaving them blind to the truth and rejecting God’s message. Yet God is our protector, and he will look after us if we follow his will.

In my testimony, Satan has torn apart every part of my life. All I did was stay faithful to God. The more I grew in spiritual knowledge and worked to purify myself, the harder the enemy tried to bring me down. The children of God have to endure to the end and that’s what I am trying to do. Nothing else even matters anymore. On Earth, the children of God are outnumbered, as there seem to be more children of darkness in the world. The children of God feel weary and worn out, tired of battling against Satan and this wicked kingdom filled with demons. Hopefully, it won’t be long before our savior descends from heaven to finally put an end to the Dragon once and for all. I am tired of dealing with cold & heartless people.

Many people become consumed by their lower, carnal nature, feeding the destructive impulses within themselves and allowing fear, pride, greed, anger, and selfish desires to overpower the spirit of love, wisdom, and compassion. When the soul becomes disconnected from higher spiritual awareness, people can begin to embody a cold and hardened nature that distances them from God, truth, and the light within. I’ve seen it firsthand, experienced it up close every day, and I’m worn out from battling the seed of the beast, the Dragon.

May God send forth His Son, Yahshua, to deliver his holy and righteous children upon the Earth and lead them into the sacred place prepared in divine peace, protection, and everlasting light. My personal life has felt like a real-life enactment of the Woman and the Dragon. It seems like the Dragon has been after me ever since I was born into this world. I’m tired of fighting this, Dragon. The war began on July 2, 2012, in my life and I’ve been battling the enemy all these years, and I hope this war ends soon. May God protect me and all his children on Earth and deliver us from this wicked kingdom. All I can hear right now is, “Be still and know I am God.” -Seraphim Sophia

Awakening Dreams and Visions, Testimony of the Saints, Thoughts of Seraphim Sophia

The Days of Great Tribulation: Be Patient in Affliction!

Leave a comment

Shalom Brothers and Sisters of the Light! May peace be with you and me always. Lately the scripture Roman 12:12 have been on my mind and it states, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” So many things have occurred in my life over the last 2 -3 years and it feels like I have been going through a great tribulation. As believers we know about the Great Tribulation that will come during the last days and for me it feels like I am experiencing that period of time in my life. At times I state, “Will I survive what I am going through?” Will I overcome the darkness? Life has been challenging for me and somedays are better than others and I try my best to get through it all. There are times when I am feeling down and I feel like giving up, but I am reminded to stay strong more importantly to keep my faith.

I have never experienced anything like what I am currently going through, and it seem that things are worsening despite my efforts. I keep telling myself that things are going to be ok and that better days will come, but will it? I continue to seek God in prayer, and I cry out seeking relief from all my sufferings. Sometimes I wonder if God is here by my side or if I have been abandoned. When we are low in spirit sometimes, we begin to think negative, but we have to catch ourselves and say, Satan get thee away from me. We can’t allow our negative thoughts to control us. We will have low moments in our lives, but we have to rise up again. I learned that I must be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer.

While I am going through this great tribulation in my life I know that I am not alone in the world. There are millions of people who are suffering from something and while I have been suffering I’ve grown closer to God. I’ve been able to reflect on my life and truly understand what has caused my suffering. Most individuals tend to blame others for their circumstances, but I decided to examine the things that I have caused and created in my own life. Through my sufferings, I have learned many valuable lessons in life. It has made me stronger and wiser. Perhaps God allows us to experience different challenges for a reason, and when I reflect on my life, I see significant soul growth. I realize how the choices that I made in my life led to different consequences. I never anticipated certain events occurring in my life, but now that they have happened, it has actually made me become a better person.

I requested for God to purify my mind, heart, body and soul and now that it has been happening to me on all levels, I don’t know to properly handle the manner in which it is occurring. It’s like the process of my purification suddenly sped up and everything started to happen all at once. It’s like I wanted to pay back all my karmic debt and be done for good. I wanted to be in the clear. When I reviewed and evaluated my own life, I could see everything being done to me as righteous judgment and it was coming from the throne of God. It’s like over time I had accumulated karmic debt from my old life, when I was sinning and in darkness (ignorance). I asked for forgiveness, and I was forgiven by God, but I still needed to learn my lessons so that I wouldn’t repeat the same sins. I knew that I was ignorant of many things so that meant that I needed to be taught. I needed to gain knowledge and understanding so that I could grow in the light of God.

When I repented to God, I accepted responsibility and accountability for the sins that I committed in my life. For me I wasn’t going to place my sins on anyone. I was the one who made certain choices in my life, and I was rebellious against God. I wasn’t following his commandments; I was following the things in this world. When I went to God with my whole heart, I truly wanted to make things right in my life. As I stood before God and his holy counsel, I feel like God gave me an opportunity to pay off my karmic debt over a period of time. Perhaps this period of time serves as the trials and tribulations I have been enduring in my life. It reflects a time of suffering, and I have been tested. Perhaps God wants to see if I am truly serious. Would I turn my back on God if things get tough in my life? Would I blame God? Would I go return back to a life of sinning?

When I was caught up before the throne on July 3, 2012, I felt like I was before a Judge. I sense that God did judge me during that time, and my records were reviewed. I feel like God gave me another chance and he created a plan for my life. That plan was sent to me via dream where he sent the messenger angel with a scroll in his hand. On July 3rd, 2012, I was given an assignment on Earth, and that work included me sharing my dreams and visions. I was told what I needed for the assignment. I grabbed all the things that I needed to start the work. When the messenger angel was sent to me, I was given a robe of righteous to wear. It was required of me to walk in righteousness. I suppose at the completion of my assignment I would be debt free. Since I have been attending school, I suppose when all courses have been passed and completed, I would graduate and ascend.

Since I was caught up to heaven in 2012, I feel like the holy angels have been here teaching and guiding me from a heavenly (spiritual) kingdom on Earth. It may not mean anything to anyone else, but I feel like the wise ones from Shamballa have been my guides. I feel like the holy ones have been ensuring that I am staying on track with my courses and that I am also learning my lessons. I know there has been tests and when certain things happen, I say, “This is a test from God.” I know I failed many tests lol. I just get back on track and try to prepare myself for the next test. When the same situations keep repeating then I know that it’s an opportunity to show what I have learned. It’s about the progression of soul growth and I know that I have been making improvements.

As time continues, I know that I must be enrolled in some sort of ascension program on Earth. I suppose there are many evolutionary programs in this Universe and each world have different programs. I feel like we have to work our way up in the kingdoms of God. We have basic programs to more advanced programs and we are all operating at different levels of consciousness. I learned there’s always room for growth. There will always be something to learn in this Universe because the Creator of All is still creating. There’s so much light (information) in this Universe and we will continue seeking the light of the Creator. We will continue to expand our consciousness. The more light we receive, the more our consciousness and the universe expand.

But I want to say this, as I have been going through this tribulation period, it’s been one thing after the other and I haven’t had a break at all. I ask God for relief all of the time. Whenever I reflect on everything all I can say is that I sought this purification. II know that God is refining me, and I will become like a pure diamond, and my soul will shine brightly. The old dreams I have had are highly significant in relation to what I am encountering now. In my dream I said, I defeat the darkness in me and that’s exactly what I am doing right now. I’m facing all the darkness within me right now. All has to rise to the surface. All of my fears have been made known to me and I am facing them head on. It’s been a terrifying experience, but I have been keeping my eyes on the Lord to help me get through it all.

God is with me always and that’s what I keep reminding myself. I put my trust in the Most High and I know that the Most High is with me no matter what. My ancestors are with me, and I am not alone. I don’t have to fight this battle by myself because I have a whole army of light warriors. God is my protector and surely, he will deliver me along with all of his other children. As I reflect on the last 12 years of my life, I’ve been working on transmuting my darkness into light. Surely, I am undergoing a transformation. I’ve gone so deep within myself to better understand my emotional pain and I know that it has caused some of my suffering. I had to face the Truth and not run away from any of it. I had to address all the issues and work on healing my traumas. It is necessary for us to address all the issues that we have so that we can work on releasing them. When we release them then we can properly heal ourselves. It took a very long time for me to understand this.

I’ve been asking for healing for so many years, and I didn’t realize how much time it would take for me to heal myself. It seems like my healing is taking place in stages. We all hear that things get worse before they get better, and I feel like I’m in that stage where everything has gotten worse. I feel like I’m almost at the finish line. I keep reminding myself to remain strong and to hold on, assuring myself that a better reality is not far away. I long for better days to come into my life. I wish for these times of great tribulation to end. I want to survive all that I am experiencing right now. I have been enduring for so long and I feel like God continues to give me strength. I just keep hearing, “Be patient!” So, I hold on to these words and I continue to be remain hopeful. I continue seeking the Creator in prayer.

Many people in the world are experiencing some form of tribulation in their lives, some more severe than others, and I pray that we all can get through it. We all experience events in life that cause us pain, and sometimes that pain becomes embedded within us, creating darkness in our energy field. That darkness is what creates our suffering. It creates all types of blockages in our life and in our body which can led to sickness and disease. We have to learn how to clear that darkness if not it will only cause us more hurt and pain. So, brothers and sisters, stay strong in Lord in these end times because things may happen suddenly, that’s what happened to me. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and keep your faith no matter what happens to you. Trust that God is here with you always. I am here praying for you all. May the light of the Creator surround you and protect you all the days of your life.